i love juice

“YOU’RE NOT DOING THIS MATE, WE ARE NOT DOING THIS!”

The day started out pretty normal, the same alarm, the same train and the same Starbucks but the rest of the day seemed to come on very fast and very surprising. I usually as a rule get in to work and check me emails first thing but as today was an open evening I had quite a lot to do and so I got started on the many jobs before the sessions started. It wasn’t until late morning that the first bit of good news came through, my job had been advertised which meant I would be able to apply (I had been working on a temp basis and the job had been made up for me personally to stay). Nice one, the bit of security I had been waiting for, I just hope I don’t mess the application up and we will be cruising. The rest of the day was rather busy with great feedback from an Observation I had earlier in the week and the usual winding up of the students to help make the day go faster.
It was about 4:00pm when the guys mentioned they would be going to the pub before the open evening began, this would ease the boredom for those who had to stay and fill the gap between students going home and visitors arriving. Now I have a rule when going the pub that you never leave on an even number, therefore you can have one pint but it must be one otherwise it will have to be three. We stayed for the three, well what I can say I had a good day and the conversation was good. So when the time came and Tenbellies was calling, my friend the Painter and I headed off to the train. The cool air and clear sky started to bring the Ale on but as we chatted on about the day and past week we hit traffic and walked over the bridge.
The Painter who is a big guy and pushing a bike was on the inside as we walked along the bridge and was the first to come in contact with a rather pissed chavy looking fella, as he bumped into he painter quite aggressively and unsteady we both thought the same thing and carried on walking not to provoke any kind of response but as we hit the crossing things took a very different turn. Feeling the aggression in the troubled fella we both turned and found that he had now started to climb over the side of the bridge ready to jump. Things here on in moved very quickly but started with myself running and grabbing the guy before he lost contact with the bridge. As my hot breath hit the cold air I shouted “YOUR NOT DOING THIS MATE, WE ARE NOT DOING THIS!” In a micro second it was not about him but us, his decision involved me now and I was pretty determined in not going for a swim in the icy water. The guy lunged forward and I started to go but within those moment the painter caught hold and it was final that this guy was going to stay very dry and very alive.
I’m not sure why this fella wanted to end it all or weather it was the drink but the look in his eye showed no remorse or regret just determination and distress. I didn’t feel sorry for this guy and I really didn’t care if he threw himself off the bridge it was just the fact that his sin, his shameless act and his trouble had been seen by my eyes and at that point his decision to kill himself was no longer his decision to make. When the police arrived and took him away the painter and I both tried to work through what had just happened and all I could feel was a kind of anger, shock and bewilderment. I’m pretty much still trying to understand this but I also have a feeling that I never will and that’s probably the best way.